Canadian Fakin'

A shuttle bus from a strip club drives by us on the street and yells
"Do you want some free passes!? -Crazy Stripper Lady
"What!?" -Nathan
"Do you guys want to see some tight asses!?" -Crazy stripper lady
"NO thanks... I don't wear glasses!" -Nathan

A lady on the corner asks us if we want coupons for something (In English)
"I'm sorry, I don't speak Spanish" -Nathan


After watching an army ad on t.v.
"The army is for poor people who don't care if they die" -Nathan



To a hot waitress
"Why do you have to be so hot that we have to tip you every time you bring us drinks? This is stupid. Can't you be uglier next time?" -Jared

Ordering pizza
"On half that pizza I'd like Canadian bacon please" -Me
"What is this Canadian bacon?" -Response from Canadian pizza place
"Uh...nevermind" -Me

Derek proceeds to put on his underwear in front us
"What the hell!" 10 second pause.... "Did you just put your underwear on in front of all of us? Why don't you do that shit in the bathroom like a normal person?" -Me
"What? I was facing the other way." -Derek

After seeing Nathan's delapidated toothbrush
"Dude, what the hell is the matter with your toothbrush? When was the last time you changed it?" -Me
"I don't know...haha" -Nathan
"It looks like a toilet bowl brush." -Me

In the Car

"How long do you think it would take to comb your hair with a toothpick" -Me

"OOHHH!!!! Prehistoric Forest!!!!" -Derek and Jerry




Quotes that I don't quite remember

What does heaven taste like?
"Heaven tastes like electronics + fish" -Me

Is this the drunkest you have ever been?
"No, there was this one time I was drunk in space and there were these monkeys...and bananas, and I was like 'hey man, what are you monkeys doing here'...and they were like 'didn't you know that there were bananas in space?'...so I was like 'oh, sorry'"

"This room is an oval, and I am the yolk. (To Derek) You are the whiteness, cause you are white. I'm the yolk cause I send out the missions."

Canada was fun, and made us all say and do some really stupid things.