Anything Wrong With This Picture?

Ah...Valentine's Day.

Does anyone else see something fundamentally wrong this picture? Wait...is that St. Valentine...making the obscene gesture of 'the shocker'? If you don't know what 'the shocker' is, and you aren't my mom, feel free to ask...but I'd be more comfortable if you looked it up. How incredibly ridiculous, he probably didn't even know it...or did he?

Valentine's Day. The day when squirrels laugh and play, little girls and boys give each other sweetheart candies that say 'I Love You,' 'Life is Good,' and 'I Know Where You Sleep.' They giggle and hug and eat themselves into diabetes.

Valentine's Day. The day that every single person loathes, the day that lingerie and liquor stores ring their cash registers all day long, and couples make sure everyone knows they are together by snuggling and smooching in public. I put in for a drawing to win a table for two for a free dinner at Long John Silvers. I didn't win, but I can imagine how happy my date would be when I said: 'Hey honey! I've got a coupon for Long John Silvers with your name on it!' If I had a date, I can imagine I'd get all kinds of rainbow kisses and dream colored smiles after that one. Or a quick kick in the groin.

Valentine's Day. I think I might buy a six pack and some sweetheart candies, light some candles, put on some Al Greene, and shoot the squirrels playing in the backyard.

If you want to read an awesome blog for Valentine's Day...check out my buddy J.D.'s blog about the love between the great Johnny Cash and June Carter. J.D., you know I give you the mad, phat, superfly, stupid, dope, dumbass, retarded, bombshit props.